Dealing with People

I find it extremely crucial to always put Him as my intention. To do things for Him and elevate His religion and not just merely for the rewards that are fulfilling that makes me feel like I’m on cloud nine —that is if I managed to be persistent and resilient in reaching my goals.

A huge part of life consists of interacting with people. If we want to progress and breeze through life, I find one of the key skills to master is our social skills. If we constantly get nervous or anxious whenever we are interacting with new people or just people, it will create too much resistance and unnecessary hurdles daily. Once we have mastered how to deal with different kinds of people, we have successfully omit a huge distraction and are able to fully direct our energy and focus on our goals. 

However, human beings can be frustrating, unfortunately and amusingly lol. It is not rocket science to realise that humans are not mind readers & unfortunately not everyone has your best interest at heart. From my upper high school to my uni days were when I realised there is a limit to being husnudzon (think kindly of people despite their actions suggesting otherwise) and mean people do exist. I sound like a 7 year old haha. I guess, another way of calling them is opportunists. Unfortunately, they don’t have to hate you to be one. Sometimes, our friends could be one without them realising. Perhaps, it is out of ignorance or they’re just a bit insensitive. Perhaps we have been once, intentionally or unintentionally, out of our personal needs. I always try my best to understand the person and try to see from their perspective when it happens but more often that not it’s plain frustrating.  After countless frustrations later, I have figured out a way to deal with this kind of people and it is to keep the conversation short, precise and direct. If it’s a no, just stop at no. You don’t have to think too much or feel bad or feel like you have to say yes when it’s putting you in a hard place. There is no need to invest emotionally when dealing with opportunists. If they are your true friends, they would understand. It could honestly act as a real friendship test - who’s the good/understanding friend and who isn’t. 

This is exactly where Him being my intention comes into the picture. It reminds me that no one is perfect and no one is able to completely be aligned to my expectations as much as I can’t for them as well. It manages my expectations as it is only Him that is perfect. It truly humbles me and it reminds me to always keep my intention pure and it is not out of greed and worldly desires. 

This applies to the simplest things like doing favours for your family or messaging your friends first to know how they’re doing — not everyone would give the same kind of effort. If we did the deed with the expectation of them reciprocating the same kind of effort then you’ll just be shattered. But if you did the deed with the expectation of being rewarded by Him then you can expect nothing less. 

When my intention is not of Him, I find myself easily being discouraged as I expect from things that are fleeting and not guaranteed. When our benchmark is Him, no hurdle is too big and nothing can bring us down. Always purify our intention and always have Him in mind. It’s liberating insyaAllah :ㅡ)